*knock knock knock* 

Is this thing on? Anyone still here? If not, that's ok- no-one really listens to me ramble anyway. 

Damn,  it's been a minute. My kids are grown(ish) and I am old(ish).  Definitely a lot to catch up on since my last post. I got a job that I love for a company that I love 🛫, my dad died, I grew depressed-the most depressed I've ever been in my life, my kids grew up and I got fat. really fat. I got lazy and unmotivated and really wanted nothing to do with life. My dad's death affected me more than I thought. 

Then in 2023 I saw pictures of me. Really saw those pictures. Those pictures depressed me even more. How the fuck did I let myself get that out of control. I broke a bench at a family party. I was humiliated, so embarrassed. 

My baby number 3 was set to graduate in 2024. She's also a varsity lacrosse player with Senior night looming. I did not want to be fat. I could not be fat. I had to slim down for pictures. So on May 8, 2023 I set out to lose weight. AND I DID!!!! 52 pounds to be exact! took me the year but I did it. 

I slimmed down for pictures. I slimmed down for me. 

And now... now that I don't hurt anymore, now that I have energy, now that I've allowed the depression to leave I have a goal. I big giant HUGE goal.

I want to run BOSTON

the marathon. 

I want to run the Boston Marathon. 

Why Boston? Because I fucking love Boston. Love everything about that city. The people the history, the scenery, the challenge...of Boston.

How am I going to get there you ask? I have no fucking idea. clueless. I just know I want to do it.

 For my 50th birthday. 

For me. 

ALL for me. 

that gives me roughly 3 years to figure this shit out. To get a plan in place, to get my running grove back. 

I went to my orthopedic doctor, Doctor Lee (love him, he helped me out when I dislocated my hip 17 years ago) he took an MRI of my knee ( I fell off a curb like a dumbass and busted it up pretty good) told me to get some PT to strengthen that shit up and said I was good to start running. 

So.. here I am. Back to sucking it up and runnnnning!!

I've been running/walking the trail near my house. It's about a tad over 2 1/2 mile loop with hills. I love it. For now. 

Today's run was perfect. It was great. I did great. I felt great. 

I'm setting out to run the Hot Chocolate race this November. I can't decide if I want to start slow and sign up for the 5k or if I should set my goal higher and sign up for the 10k. I still have time to decide. After today's run, I want to do the 10k. but how will I feel tomorrow? most likely dead

What a difference shoes make

Got my new shoes yesterday. I got the Kayano 18's from Asics. I loved my 16's so much I just had to keep the brand. I got them for an insanely great deal from Running Warehouse. $110.06 for the shoes (msrp $150) a pair of socks and a shopping bag. Not to mention free 2 Day air from UPS!! Crazy!

So I tried them out today at the gym and put in a 4 mile run. My feet didn't hurt and my thighs weren't screaming at me a minute into my run. Felt awesome!!! So glad to have some new shoes to help with my mileage. I'm working my way up to 5 for the Shamrock Shuffle coming up at the end of March- woo hoo! Run on!

on a side note...

I logged 27.51 miles for the Month of January. Well below my goal. I've set the same goal for February, I have new shoes coming Friday. I'm hoping that's the kick in the pants I need.

afraid

trying to get the courage to hit submit. I'm trying to decide if I will be able to run the Shamrock shuffle 8k in March. That's 5 miles (right?)
January 2nd is the last time I ran 5 miles. In  65 minutes. I have not been able to get past 2.5 miles on the treadmill. I did run the 5k in January- and that was ok. Had to keep telling myself to keep going.
I'm afraid.

Is it worth it?

I've been asking myself that question a lot lately. My actions, are they worth it? Am I worth it?  What's the point anyway? I hate those questions. really really hate them.

I realized this morning that, dammit- I AM worth it. Me. Me. Me. I am worth it.

I worked last night, didn't get home til 11:30ish and by the time I was ready for bed, it was past midnight. I knew I needed to get up to run this morning. I knew it was going to be tough. I also new it was going to be cold. On my drive home from work last night I thought to myself,  "maybe I can just forget to set my alarm. Maybe I can set it too low to hear. I'll wait til I see what I feel like in the morning."

6:30 came awfully damn soon. I heard my alarm. heard it loud and clear. I snoozed. I thought, "Do I really want to get out of this nice, warm, comfortable bed. Just to go run a race?"
I did. I got out of bed, and got dressed. I wore Ken's under armour, the race shirt, and my Monster Dash performance fleece. I wore my capri's and then my comfy yoga pants on top. Ate breakfast- and out the door I went. Stopped at Dunkin Donuts for the best coffee in the world and drove on my merry way.

During the drive, I came across some early morning runners. They loooked cold. really cold. I almost turned around to go back home. I asked myself, "Is it really worth it? Is it really worth the gas? Is it really worth worth it? I didn't think it was, but I kept driving to my destination anyway.
Arrived to my destination. It looked cold. The volunteers were setting up the cones, the plow trucks were salting the roads. It looked cold. My Saturnmometer read 14 degrees. yuck. I wanna go home and go back to sleep in my nice comfy bed.

I messaged some friends.."It's 14 degrees outside and I'm waiting in line for a 5k. Who am I?"

I am a runner. I am a determined runner to get fit and healthy and not fat and flabby. I am Sue. I am worth it.

Race started, good crowd! I was not expecting so many people for being a park district event. That made it easier for me to do this. Lots of people running. In the cold. For nothing other than the fact that you finished. I did get a nice tech tshirt and they were serving soup from Olive Garden afterwards. But no one was paying these people to run. No one paid me to go. I did it on my own.

I kept about a 11:09 (that's what runkeeper kept telling me) minute pace. At the halfway point I wanted to stop to walk. I kept telling myself not to stop. If I stop to walk, I'll stop to walk again. I just kept repeating to myself, "You can do this. You can finish. You can get there."

And I did. my time was 36:07. [ EDIT: Official from active.com 153    83 SUSAN LEWIS                F  34  22/28   36:05.4 11:37 LOCKPORT, IL ]    I am happy with that time. It could be faster, yes, but 36:07 is a good time. for me. After the race was complete and I stood in line for my water and banana (I passed on the soup like an idiot) I felt so proud of me. Who gets up at the ass crack of dawn to run outside in 14* weather? WHO DOES THAT? Only crazy people. Crazy people like ME!

Race day is tomorrow!!!

Gotta get my gear together tonight so I can be ready in the a.m. I work tonight, hopefully I'm out early. I don't think I close- I sure do hope not!!!
I haven't put much mileage in this week either. I don't think it'll be a problem for tomorrow, but we'll see!

Why?

Why can't I get to 5 miles again??? After taking the month of December totally off from all gym type activities, I was able to run 5 miles in a little over 60 minutes. Now, second time, I can barely get to 2 miles. I'm not winded just bored and tired by 2 miles. Frustrating!!!!
Soooo for today I put in 3.1 (took 39 effing minutes) and 15 minutes on the stepper. Today also started the 100 Day Burpee Challenge. 1 burpee this morning, done and done! A few friends and I are in the 100 day challenge. Today was 1 burpee, tomorrow 2 burpee's and so on. Til we get to 100 days. Abbi is in it too. Great motivation right there!

anatomy 101

When I go back to school this coming August, I am for sure including an Anatomy class. I wish I knew what all the muscles and bones were called in my body. I ran today, while being sick. Was only able to muster 2.5 miles. I did finish in 30 minutes, so I guess that's right on target with the 60 minute 5 miles. As I was cooling down, I felt a twinge in my left lower thigh area. I'm thinking hamstring? Not sure. I'm gonna stretch and ice. Hopefully it feels better by Monday's run (hopefully all kids and myself will be healthy!) which is going to be 5 miles.

As for today, I:
warmed up for one song @3.7
ran for 8 songs @5.2-5.5
cooled down to one song @3.5

then I went on the stepper machine for 16 minutes. Did the 5 program(glutes) at a level 7. Got 1.5 miles in that way.

this is by far my favorite elliptical machine. It's older, but is really awesome for getting rid of the flabby flab hanging onto your hips.

After my workout, I went to BB and bought myself a new iphone armband for the upcoming Frosty 5k. It's a rocketfish and was onsale and is soooooo much better than the cheapo I got off Ebay last year!

Tomorrow, Abbi has a gymnastics meet at Illinois Wesleyan University down in Bloomington, IL. No work out for me- just walking and sitting and cheering. And takin pics!!

Yoga for runners

Must save this for reference! Wow- does anyone (does anyone read this anyway?) have tenderness in their butt after running? I know I do. These stretches look amazingly easy to do and just watching them makes my piriformis syndrome much better!

sick

Why is it when I get my mojo back, one of my kids or I get sick?? UGH! I ran Monday this week. That's it. My poor Allison is sick. Ear infection and cold. Totally wiped her out. I feel so helpless when my babies are sick.
I need to get the motivation to go to the gym after work. Running around, waiting on tables, running food and cleaning for a 5 hour shift and then running 5 miles does not sound fun to me. At the end of my shift I would rather come home and sleep. I'm usually exhausted by the end of the night. Tonight, I'm planning on hitting the gym after work and putting in at least 3 miles. hopefully. that's the plan anyway. What can I do to make myself go??

found one!

got my January race- it's 11 days away. Not too far from my dad. It's located in Burbank and they'll have soup afterwards! YUM! I am HOPING it's not too cold. Today the windchill is 12*. Not fun. I'll just layer it up and run fast so I can get some soup ;-)

yup ;-)

I'm feeling it all right. Woke up and my abs and thighs are achy. It's a good ache. A great ache! I'm so super proud of me. Haven't set foot in the gym since November and ran 5 miles in a little over an hour yesterday. What a great feeling!

I'm searching for a January race to enter. Not sure what or where to run....off to look!

Gonna feel that in the morning

ran 5 miles today! Time was 61:34
:)
I warmed up to 1 song at 3.7 mph,
ran 9 songs at 5.1 mph,
walked 1 song at 3.6,
ran 2 songs between 5.2 and 5.5
walked 1 song at 3.6
ran 2 songs between 5.5-6.2
then cooled down 1 song at 3.2.

I think my total mileage was 5.20 because I walked a bit more for my cool down. During my last run, 5.5-6.2, my right knee started hurting. Was it because I was speeding up or is it because I need new shoes? I know I'm due for new shoes pretty soon. I'm looking at the Kayano's again. Maybe the 18's? Definitely the 17's. Just depends on the cashish I have in hand.
Over all, the run was good. I kept pushing myself. Telling me that I can do it and then picturing the drunk mom in the movie Varsity Blues yelling, "You can do it!" I giggled a little. I'm in the process of downloading the Hunger Games Trilogy onto my Kindle. Audio version. I'm gonna listen to the books and run. Again and again and again. Woo hoo!

I missed the gym. Wasn't there all of December. It was packed!!!! I'll be happier to not have to wait for a treadmill come February. ;-)

told ya

So, just registered for Warm your heart 5k on Feb. 26th. Looks pretty fun. Indoor, downtown Chicago, on the lake front. Realized after hitting submit that Abbi has a meet that same weekend. oops. Race is 9am Sunday, I'm hoping her meet is Saturday or later Sunday.
Now I'm off to find a race for January. Think I can find another one indoors? I'm a wimp in the cold.

I'll be back kids....

promise!!! Jan 2-hitting it hard. No resolutions just promises. to me and me alone. No one else can do this for me. It's all on me :) a friend of mine said it best, 2012 is all about me!!! I'm putting me first and if you don't like, see ya!

35:35 :)

yippeeeeeeee!!! RAM racing just posted the updated times for the 5k race this past weekend. A semi got stuck so the course needed to be re-routed, the length of the race was longer than a 5k. As it stands, I ran the 5k in 35:35!!! YAY!! I'm super happy with this time. super de duper happy :) my time improved from last week. YAY!
can you tell I'm excited?

I hope the link stays active for awhile- Hot Chocolate 5k result

Will run for chocolate!!

Another day, another race under my belt. Abbi and I got up at the ass crack of dawn dark and early this morning (5 am!) and headed to Chicago for the the Hot Chocolate 5k race. We were meeting my friend Jill and her daughters Aleigha and Chloe and also Jill's mom-aka Nana. It was cold, and dark, and way too early!!!

Aleigha and I ran the 5k and Jill ran the 15k. The race was HUGE! 40,000 runners were there this morning. Insane! I have never been a part of such a large running crowd before. It was crazy. It was unreal. It was so cool.

a gazillion runners headed to the start line

The race was set to go off at 7:40. 7:40 came and went before we even budged in our "O" corral. It was 8:25 before we were even herded down the street to the start line. Apparently, a semi got stuck under a viaduct on one of the streets on the course (why am I not surprised? when will these truck drivers learn their rig is just too big?) Once the race did go off, it was great-aside from all the walkers walking in the way already!!! I actually got choked up a little bit (dorkus) running past the Chicago Theater. Why? I have no idea. Maybe because I was running. Maybe because it was on an open Chicago street. Maybe I'm just really a dork.
Since the semi got stuck, the race route had to be re-routed. It's been said (on FB) that the route was 3.32 miles instead of 3.1 so my finish time (while still disappointing to me) is off a bit. I'm awaiting official confirmation for my "official" time. As it stands, I've been put in the record book with a time of 37:19. ugh. that's 9 seconds slower than last weeks race. ugh I only walked at the end when the course was going uphill. ugh ugh ugh.
On a positive note, I ran 3.32 miles in 37:19 minutes.
 I need to work on my speed and my uphill running too :)

At the end of the race, Ghiradelli supplied hot chocolate and fondue. It was soooooooo yummy. The hot cocoa was perfect. So rich, so creamy so whip creamy. The fondue was fabulous. They served chocolate with a pretzel, marshmallow, half a banana, apple pieces and a rice crispie treat.
 

Chloe and Abbi enjoying their fondue.
A super sweet woman gave us her
tickets for fondue.YAY!
I didn't have to share

All in all, I finished. I started and finished another run. That's all that should matter. I should not be beating myself up for my time. I finished and my oldest daughter was there to see me finish.

Fell off the wagon- but climbing back on

It's been a while since I posted. It's been a while since I cared enough to run. I get in these funks. I get in these crazy moods. I get crazy! Life gets in the way and I get even crazier!! Well, I'm back on the wagon and back to running and hopefully back to blogging. Just for me. And for whoever else may stumble upon my boring ass, no giveaway blog.

I've decided to run at least one 5k race a month for a year and hopefully finish big with a 1/2 marathon in December 2012. In Vegas. For the Rock 'n' Roll series*. I love Vegas. Running the 1/2 is my excuse to go back. I need to start saving now, but I think I should be able to save enough to get me there and have some play money too.
I started my journey of one 5k a month with the Monster Dash 5k on October 29th. I ran it with Ken. It was his first race ever. He loved it. He wants to run one again. He's  bummed that he passed up the Hot Chocolate 5k  that I'm running tomorrow, November 5th. I'm meeting my friend Jill and her daughter Aleigha in Chicago. Bright and early at the ass crack of dawn. I'm dragging Abbi with me. I plan to get up by 5 and be out the door by 6 to reach our destination by 7. The race starts at 7:40am. There's 40,000 runners running this thing tomorrow. Forty effing thousand. That's a ton of people. It's going to be a madhouse. It's going to be amazing. It's going to be awesome. I can not wait!! I haven't run since Monday. I hope I don't suck.
I lost all motivation this week. Why do I get like that??? How am I ever going to get to that 1/2 marathon if I never train. If I never run more than 3 miles. Why can't I stick to a plan? grrrrr.




*Rock 'N' Roll series may not make a stop in Vegas next year. If that's the case, I'll have to find a different race to run...maybe in Key West???? I love Key West just as much, if not more, as Vegas.

being sick sucks!!

AHHH!!!! I was 4.5 miles short of my goal last month. So effing bummed. I got sick. Not pukey sick, but no energy sick. All I wanted to do was sleep. sleep. and more sleep. It was like this for a good 10 days. Thank goodness that's over. Now I can get back at it!

I ran four miles yesterday, it felt good. After my run my legs felt like jello. Today the quads are sore. A good sore! Gotta get some runs in this week so I'm ready for my lakefront runs with my friends from out of town. GIRLS WEEKEND!!! woo hoo! no kids, no hubby, no house. Just girls and drinks and runs and FUN! It's a well needed break and I am looking forward to it! So glad I was sick the end of June and NOT girls weekend-yay!!!